Stranger Things Have Happened

Actually, stranger things have not happened. Nothing has happened. I have nothing to write about.

I did have something in mind the other day, but I don't remember what it was. I'm sure it had to do with April.....I think it might have been about when we tried to prank Floamy and April ended up being tied to her chair as Mr. Potato Head hung from the ceiling. This memory was provoked by redlaw's blog on pranking.

Oh, the joyous times of college dormatory life.

It comes and goes.....

Want to hear something gross? Too bad, you're going to have to anyway. Keep reading. Really, just do it. 'Cmon!

Anyway, since Sunday, I'd been feeling like a blister had been forming on my little toe on my left foot. I ignored it, because - really - who wants to take the energy and bend over to look at your toe? Not me.

However, on Tuesday, I decided I better look at it, just in case it wasn't a blister and it was some kind of tumor and I was going to die. Might as well just take a peek to avoid anything disastrous, right? Right.

So, I find that not only is it a blister on my toe, the blister is as big as my little toe. And even though it's not that big, because a little toe is little, since it was the whole size of my toe, I think that qualifies as being big. And then I did what anyone would do, I got a sterile needle and tried to drain it. Problem solved, right?

Wrong.

Yesterday, in the middle of the day, my toe starts to throb. And I couldn't even walk on it by the end of the day. And as I was limping around my house, my mom laughs at me because of my "little tiny blister". So, I un-sock and show her my toe, which she then proclaims, "Ewww. That's not a blister....it's a deformity." Yeah. Thanks, mom!

I couldn't figure out what to do. Draining it hadn't worked. Ignoring it hadn't worked. Maybe cutting off my toe would be less painful? I seriously considered it. But then I decided against it. That would cost too much. So, I did what anyone in my situation would do - I propped up my feet and watched T.V.

During a commercial, I decided to examine my toe once again, just to look at my "deformity" as some may call it. I knew there was fluid in there, so I just thought that if I could drain it again, it might work the second time around. It just had to. So, while I was trying to gather the fluid in one general area so I could stick the needle in, the darn thing exploded. Seriously.

There was so much fluid in it, it made a pool on the floor, and I had some dripping off of my hand. It was kind of cool, in a weird sort of way. I imagine it sounded 1/10th of what someone's water breaking would sound like. Don't ask me why, I'm just weird.

But, today, my toe feels fine - as if nothing had ever happened. And it looks fine, too. Like nothing was ever there. Strange, yet gross and amazing all at the same time!

Killing me softly

Last night I had an embarassing moment. Unfortunately no one was around to see it. I think that it would have been funny to witness, had I been someone else. I'll try to recount it, but my abililty to recapture a situation through words is pretty poor, but here goes....

My dad has a shed that we park our cars in at night. There's a corn burner in there and it keeps everything nice and warm so we're pretty certain that our cars will start every morning (sometimes I don't know if that's a blessing or not.) Last night, I pulled up and got out of my car, went into the shed and slid open the huge door. This door is huge and heavy. It's almost the width of the front of the shed and just about as high. I have a tough time opening and closing it.

So, I drove my car in, got out and went to pull the door closed. When I close it, I have one foot in the shed and one foot outside and pull the door towards me, one hand on each side of the door. I got a little bit of a "running" start (I use the word loosely, since it just means I'm walking backwards kind of swiftly) and proceeded to pull it shut at a fast pace.

Then, in the middle of this, I start to slide down the door, my legs on each side of the door, and the door in my crotch. Kind of like a pole dance. I had somehow slipped on a patch of ice and in the midst of going fast, just sat down, bringing the door to a halt (which was good, because I had almost closed the door. However; here I was sitting on the cold ground, one leg in the shed, one leg outside of the shed, and the dang door in my crotch while my back was up against the stopping point. I was totally stuck.

The first thing that went through my mind was "Effin' A!" Seriously. The exact words. Then, my dogs came running up, thinking that I wanted to play, so they were jumping on me while I was tring to shove the door back enough so that I could stand up. I gave up my fight and decided I should just wait for someone to come and find me. So I sat there for a few seconds. But at this point I realize that I'm sitting in a pile of snow and ice, and that my butt is really getting cold. I was not amused.

I finally got up, got the door closed and made it to the house without another incident. If someone would have watched me, it would have been humorous. Too bad I live in the middle of no where.

Love Monkey

Who would name their T.V. show Love Monkey? Seriously. I don't really get the I-must-watch-this-new-show feeling when I hear this title. Does anyone else feel this way? But, I have to admit that I did watch it because two of my favorite actors are on the show (and, no, one of them isn't Jason Priestly)

Someone asked me today if I got my hair done. I said that I got it cut last week, but today I woke up an hour before I had to leave for work (rather than 20 minutes) and did my hair. Funny how people would notice. Hmmm.

I heard the song "Get out of dreams, and into my car" by whoever it is and I thought of April and Kristen. Why do I think of them?

Also, I hear songs from Zoolander on the radio a lot throughout the day; therefore, I think of Zoolander a lot. I must watch it this weekend.

Grrrrrrr

Four jobs you have had in your life:
* Worked in a grocery store in High School and learned to decorate cakes.
* Presently work for a Title Insurance Company
* Worked in a winery one summer. Pretty fun job.
* Worked at Wal Mart for all of 2 months. Hated it.

Four movies you could watch over and over:
* Fried Green Tomatoes
* Little Women
* Ever After
* Miracle (yes, I'm a dork)

Four places you've lived:
Argyle, WI (growing up)
Superior, WI (during college)
Duluth, MN (after college)
Brodhead, WI (when I was, like, 2)

Four TV shows you love to watch:
* Desperate Housewives
* Grey's Anatomy
* Cold Case
* CSI (the original, I like Nick)

Places you've been on vacation:
Las Vegas, NV
Palm Springs, CA
Colville, WA
Sacramento, CA

Four of your favorite foods:
* Sweet and Sour Chicken
* Veggie Lover's Pizza from Pizza Hut
* Mexican rice
* Doughnuts

Four places you'd rather be right now:
Home, not at work.
Palm Springs, swimming
Superior, visiting Kristen and April
Heaven, can't this all just be over?

Four sites you visit daily:
April
Kristen
Jolene
Hotmail

Four Bloggers I am tagging:
Sorry, kids, the fun stops here. I refuse to play tag. I'm out of breath.

Food Cures Everything

As Americans, we create an obese country because we are always told that food cures everything emotionally negative. (Women more so than men, too.) Case in point - the Jif peanut butter commercial. Have you seen this? Two little girls are having a sleepover. The little dark haired girl is moping around and saying "Maybe a sleepover isn't such a good idea." So, the other little girl gets the look of "I have an idea" on her face and says, "I'll be right back." Then it shows her making a pb sandwich and she takes it back to the room and the girls are smiling and eating when the mom comes in and asks how they're doing. And the little dark haired girl (who was pathetically homesick two minutes ago) says, "We're doing great!"

No wonder I want to eat anytime I feel sad or down. It's because of the Jif commerical and the fact that it's telling me that food will cure everything. (Did I totally just justify my bad eating habits? Will that work??)

Adventures of Unibrow: Part 3

Last night my mom and I were watching the WB's "Beauty and the Geek". One of the 'geeks' (who was kind of arrogant and I didn't like him anyway) had a unibrow. The 'beauties' were trying to get him to fix it by plucking or waxing or something, and he refused. After that segment my mom turned to me and said, "You must call Uni!". We both laughed. A lot.

Kayla is coming this weekend. Yay! She got her hair cut and from what I've heard she's really cute, but I haven't seen it yet. It will be fun to see her again.

Nothing new or exciting. I have a blister on the bottom of my foot. I think that means I should eat a lot of cookie dough ice cream. Yummy!

I almost had a heart attack the other day because my mom asked me how old I was going to be on my next birthday and I thought about it and realized I'm going to be 27. TWENTY SEVEN! Where does the time go? I don't even feel that I could be that old!! Gosh!

The Bachelor

I love this show! And it's not because of the promise of love, or the chance that someone will find his true love, blah blah blah. Oh, no. It's because of the horribly pathetic women who come on the show and try to find The One, and are crushed when he doesn't pick them. It's also because women are so fierce when they are fighting for a man's attention, and they all look like devils. It is a great thing to watch: the deterioration of a woman's self respect as she tries to fall in love with someone who will eventually realize that from all the fame of being on the show, he'll have much better women to pick from after the show than the 25 that were chosen in the beginning. Because, let's face it, when people put this together, they only do it for dramatic effect, not for true love.

*sigh* Television at it's best.

In other news, we all know that I'm a dork, right? Right. So the other day, as I'm walking down the street, I see a silver car (nice car) do a very good job of parking in a spot that I'd never in a million years even attempt to park. And when they were done, I said to myself, "Nice job, Parky Parkerton." What the?! I must get out more and have more conversations with normal people.

I had a bunch of stuff to write last week, but, alas, I was busy at work, so those thoughts will all fall to the wayside. Oh, well. They were probably moronic thoughts as those above.

Resolution?! What's That?

Welcome to a new year. I hope it ends better than it started, but we're only 4 days in, so it could be iffy!

Nathaniel and Missy set a wedding dated for October 6, 2007. (He said that it will give her mom time to save for the wedding, but I think he's just trying to put it off as long as possible. Not that anything between them would really change after they're married, because they live like married people now, they just sign a license and file a joint tax return. My mom says it will be good to have them stop "living in sin". She's funny)

I was going to make a resolution this year. Somthing different and exciting, but really, if I had I would have broken it by now. So, we'll see if maybe in February I want to make one. I originally thought that I should write down something every day that I did to make myself a better person, no matter how small an action, and then at the end of the year I could look back and see 365 things I did positively during the year so that my year wasn't a waste. But, alas, I couldn't find a notebook to write them down in.

Note to self: get a new notebook.

I have no other news. My parents both work at the same place now, and they always sit around talking about it in the evenings, so that now I've been forced to call myself an orphan, due to lack of attention. If I wanted to be ignored and left out, I would just move out. Sheesh!

I have decided that Orlando Bloom is hot. Never thought so before, but I then I watched Kingdom of Heaven over the weekend - 3 times. What a hottie.