"Just tell me you love me, you pussy"

My brother, Justin, and I rented some movies on Saturday. One of them was "Stealth" with the guy from "Sweet Home Alabama" - all I know is that he's hot, not his name....names mean nothing to me when I'm daydreaming....I digress. Anyway, the last line of the movie is the best, as appears above. The movie was o.k. and would have been less than momorable, if not for the that quote. *sigh* If only I had someone to tell that to!

I didn't get the job at the school - which ticks me off royally, since they contacted me to apply again because I "was their second choice last time and the only reason I didn't get it was that I didn't have the 08 Certification, otherwise it would have been yours." Liars (actually, I've used harsher words, but that is naughty and I don't want to be naughty.) My parents are even more ticked and have forbidden our family from doing any business in town anymore (which wouldn't be a big deal, except that on Saturdays, mom and I have a routine where we go to the dump, go to the bank, and stop at the store for a treat. I no longer get a Saturday treat.)

So, now I have to figure out what to do with my life. I wanted to go to Law School, but I don't know if I want that anymore. I always get sucked into doing things my parents want me to do, but I would like to find something that I want to do this time. We'll see.

My brother, Nathaniel, has been spending a lot of time at our house lately because he's mad at his boss, so he's not working right now. The other day when he was over, we were putting up Christmas decorations while he just sat there and watched. Now, he is weird - just keep this in mind, and when you picture the scenario in your head, remember he's a big dumb animal, folks.

We have a candy dish on our hutch, and he took it to the table and was picking through the candy - not eating any of it, just seeing what was there. I was about 3 feet away, going through ornaments, not really paying attention. All of a sudden, he starts laughing and throwing little boxes of 'Dots' candy at me. I look up and glare, wondering why he'd waste candy like that. My mom, who was watching him, is laughing, too and asks him what he's doing. To which he replied, "If you were in a national park and a bear was coming at you, all you'd have to do is throw food at them and they'd go away!" So he throws more Dots at me while yelling "Get away! Get away!" Yes, people, he was throwing candy at me as if I were a big bear. He needs mental health help!!

I still think my favorite Nathaniel story is when one day he yells out, "I'm caucasian!" Yes. Sometimes I think he is blonde.

"She thinks I'm cute like a baby turtle's cute"

Just to warn you, I'm slightly nauseated by the candle I lit in the office, and I think I'm going to pass out, so if there is a continual ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ pattern somewhere in the end of this post, it means I passed out on my keyboard and the pointiest part of my head has landed on the "z" key!

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We did. We stayed home since we saw everyone at Uncle Clair's funeral on Wednesday. It was sad, but he's so in a better place now.

Kayla was over this past weekend and we watched 'Simon Birch'. Love that movie. Here is my favorite quote from it:

What I want to do and what I do are two completely different things. If
everyone went around doing what they wanted to do, there would be chaos.

I had a ton of things in my head to write about, but since I am hazy from the candle, I think I'll save them till next week. 'Til then.....

Welcome To The World!

Todd and Nicole had their 2nd baby on November 2, 2005. He arrived at 12:03 pm, 9lbs, 12oz. They named him Arlen Michel.

The meaning for Arlen is after Todd's uncle who passed away and his grandparents Armin and Darlene. Michel is the french form of Michael. They both liked Michael but there are a few of those in their family. So they went with French.

Congratulations!

Peanut Butter Kisses

My new favorite candy (and by candy, we all know I mean anything with chocolate in it, because if there' s no chocolate, there's no reason) is Hershey's Peanut Butter Kisses. So delicious, and so wonderfully smelling. I curse the person who made them so addicting!

I colored my hair last night. I used to be blonde - very blonde. And now I'm so not. I would describe the overall color as dark brown, and I have streaks of what I'd call black cherry red throughout. It's a very drastic change, but I quite like it. As long as I don't look gothic, I'm o.k. with having dark hair. Once the red hi-lights fade a bit, I'm sure I'll like it much better. I remember a year ago we put red in my hair and it glowed red for about 2 weeks. I like this time's color experiment much better.

The only other story(ies) from my trip worth telling you about involve alcohol. Since I wasn't going to be driving at all on my trip, I took the opportunity to drink like I haven't in ages. One of Lori's friends from work, Jennylee, came over and we had Red Bull and Vodka the Saturday night I got there. Then we moved on to Smirnoff Twisters (green apple for me, raspberry for everyone else = the most drinks for me). I was feelin' a good buzz. Then Lori wanted to go shoot pool, but we didn't want to drive because we had been drinking, so Lori called a cab company. They said it would be 45 minutes. So, she called the second cab company. 45 minutes. Then, she called the third cab company and the guy says to her, "The more you keep calling, the longer it will take." So hilarious! Even though the numbers on the internet were under different names and had different numbers, they must have been the same company. We cracked up. And then ended up staying home and drinking.

The next night we tried to get into a bar called 'Referees' which was pretty close to Lori's house. Jennylee is only 20, so we were going to try to get her in (she was our designated driver, but Duy insisted that they were going to card her anyway). So, Lori made Jennylee keep her licesne in the car. When we walked in noone was at the door, so we just walked towards the bar, but then a guy dressed as a referee (clever) stopped us to check our IDs. Lori and I showed him ours, and then Jennylee pretended to dig through her purse and say that she didn't have hers. He said that unless she had identification with a birthday on it, he couldn't let her in. So, she opens her wallet and says, "I have a dollar." He looked at her and pointed to the door. So funny!

Then, the last night I was there, we finally got to the pool hall and played some pool. We sucked, so we went home at 11pm. Nothing too exciting happened there.

So, that's my trip in a nutshell. Nothing crazy or exciting, just weird and memorable.

All you need is.......chocolate

Dear faithful readers (all 2 of you) here is my most memorable Sacramento, California story. And it's a story that Kristen will appreciate (but I won't tell of the subject matter until the end, as I don't want to give away the story). So, here goes....

Lori has a 3 year old named Carter. He is not a well behaved child at all. Lori and Duy are constantly yelling at him for misbehaving (jumping on the couches, climbing on the stair railing, jumping off tables, and general hitting and kicking). He even had the nerve to come up to me and punch me in the stomach - not that it was hard to miss, there's so much. But, he was driving me crazy pretty much the whole time. Very disrespectful.

The week I was there, he had a little zip-lock bag full of Hershey's kisses (and no, he never offered me one) that he carried around with him. One day, I was sitting with Tyler (her 12 year old) on the couch watching TV. Carter had been saying "Chick-en! Chick-en!" all week because he wanted to see Chicken Little. (But we didn't because of his unruly behavior). Well, as I was sitting there, Lori was outside smoking, so Carter brought me the baggie, saying "Chick-en! Chick-en!" I figured he needed help opening one of the kisses, so I (being so wonderful) took the bag from him.

Upon examining the contents of the bag (and by examination, I mean squishing it) I realized that it was not, in fact, Hershey's kisses, but it was poop. Yes! He pooped in the bag! And brought it to me. I shoved it at Tyler, and said "I think he pooped in the bag!" And Tyler took it, laughing, to show his mom. I was mortified. Carter just laughed.

The more I think of it, it does make me laugh - especially how he was saying "Chick-en! Chick-en!"

Kristen, I though you'd appreciate a good 'poop' story. (As we all remember the incident of Todd at the bar, announcing that he had to take a sh*t, and Kristen's story of the pea in the Library bathroom....ah, so many memories!)

Anyway, other than that, we just hung out, drank a lot, and I got fake nails put on - which is why there are probably a million spelling errors on this page, it's so hard to type! But, it was fun and relaxing. We saw 'The 40 Year Old Virgin' for $3, it was hilarious and cheap! Not too shabby (*Adam Sandler-ish) We flew over the Rockies on the way back to Minneapolis, and it was really cool to see. I had window seats all the way there and the way back.

And that, my friends, is all I have time for now. More stories of my trip to come, but I thought I'd share the most memorable one with you now. 'Til later....

Chick-en! Chick-en!

Oh, the story I have to tell! But I don't have time to tell it right now. I survived my California truip, but I'm at work and am swamped. I only have 10 minutes left. Yay!

Today is my mom's birthday, so I'm off to dinner with my grandparents, parents and Nathaniel and Missy. I hope that it's fun. I would hate to waste a night out on non-fun people.

However, I do have disappointing news. I got my latest roll of film developed, and on it were the pictures I took when I visited in Aug/Sept (?) for Kristen's very be-lated birthday. Remember that we took pictures at the cemetary? Well, they came out clear as a bell. (I think it was because I prayed before we went in there!) So, I'll email them to you somtime so you can look at them....and the one of April acting out the story that Kristen was reading. It's super hilarious!!

So sad to be so far away!!

Scared to death by.....

haybales. Yes, that is correct. Last night I was scared to death (of course, I've obviously come back from the dead) by a field of haybales. Let me recount the horror for you....

So, I was driving home last night. It was dark. Just driving along, driving along, doo doo doo (Tommy-Boy-ish-ly) and out of the corner of my eye, I see something in the field to my right. So, I slow down, ever afraid that I will hit a deer and total my $800 car. I see not one object, but at least 100 of them. I can't decipher what they are, so I slow down even further, trying to keep my car on the road while not hitting anything and trying to see what the heck is in that field. My first thought was that they were deer and that they would stampede me. Then I thoguht they were turkeys (which I have hit before and lost a beloved hubcap) and that freaked me out, too. They could attack.

Finally, I slowed down to about 10 mph and really took a good look. Now, mind you, it is dark out - pitch black to be exact. And I realize that I have been scared to death of a field of round bales. Yes. Round bales.

You can imagine my relief when I realized I wasn't going to be attacked, stampeded or trampled by anything. And then you can imagine the wave of idiocy that washed over me.

Sometimes, I'm so blonde that I can't even stand it.

I'm off to California in the morning. Pray that I don't die on an airplane. That would suck. You can pray, though, that I meet the man of my dreams on the plane. And that he's rich, talented, caring, good with cars, will build me a dream house, and take care of my parents when they get old. And that he wants lots of children. And....wait, it's too much now. Not even God could create him. *sigh* But maybe you could pray for a good meal on the flight - that's a little more practical, right?! Duy is going to pick me up at the airport 'cause Lori has to work until 1:30. I told her to make him hold up a cardboard sign with my name on it. I have a feeling he won't.

Will write all about my adventures (or lack thereof) when I return on the 14th! Yay!

Nothing Is So Common As the Desire To Be Great

Why is it that when I'm going on vacation that's when people pile on the work for me? Not that lately it's been slow, because it hasn't. Lately I've had to stay late to finish everything, and just when I thought that it was going to slow down so I could get caught up before I leave - BAM - everyone wants everything. And now!

I woke up at 5am to the sound of what I though were sirens. It scared me, but as I listened more, I knew it sounded more like animals than anything, so I rolled over and attempted to go back to sleep. But then I thought that maybe it was a flock of birds going to attack (Alfred Hitchcock-like) and I was scared for a split second before I realized I didn't care as much about that as getting another hour of sleep, so I didn't wake up enough to think about my odd thoughts. When I asked my mom about it she said it was coyotes, which makes sense because for the last 2 weeks our dogs have been howling at night because they hear the coyotes, too. I live in the middle of nowhere!

Well, off to another job. I am crazy, aren't I? Yes. Yes, I am!

The Adventures of Unibrow

At the suggestion of April, I decided to join in on the fun of blogging and start my own. But, before I go any further, I must say, April and Kristen, that if you do not put any comments in my comments section, I will be forever scarred. (Please feel guilty and put nice comments) And for those who are just haphazardly passing by and reading this, please note that I am not an English major. Don't expect perfection or exemplary writing. You will get neither.

Anyway, I had a dream about Uni last night. I suppose the premise for it was that I was talking to Deb (my boss at the gallery) about him last night, because my mom had run into his fiance's mom in Wal-Mart the other day. She was telling me how Uni and Mrs-Uni-to-be stopped by her house on Sunday to drop off some containers they had borrowed. Deb said it was gruesome watching them together because Mrs-Uni-to-be was trying to hold Uni's hand and grab his arm to hold it, but he was not responding to her at all. If that doesn't tell you that he doesn't care about her and that he's only marrying her to marry someone, I don't know what will.

But, in my dream (as was the point of all of this) he had to redecorate his bathroom, which in real life he was really proud of when we were together, because she wanted flowers and butterflies on the walls. It looked tacky, and he was sad in the dream. And, of course, I just laughed at him.

I have an affinity towards Watermelon flavored Jolly Ranchers, but how come when I open a bag of them, there are only two and the rest are the blue or purple ones? It's just not fair. I had to resort to a purple one today, and I suspect - though I do not know for sure - that at this moment my tongue may in fact be purple. So attractive.

I'm getting excited to go to California, so if you have anything you want me to bring back, suggest now or forever hold your peace.